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Charley Looks For A Job
A Story by Lee
Charley was born in the "Age of Computers." He was a real computer whiz from the time he was 5 years old. Charley was so good in computers he taught himself to program in Microsoft Basic, Cobol and Fortran, C, C+, C++, C+++, C+++++++, and in assembler and machine language. Charley was so smart in computers he knew what the computer was going to do before the computer did it. Some people thought he was psychic.
Charley quit high school and went to work as a computer programmer. He was much Smarter than Bill Gates when it came to Computers.
Charley was happy as long as he was programming the computer. He could write computer programs like Mark Twain wrote fiction stories. So Charley moved up in the world. His abilities were much in demand and companies heard of the fame of Charley and what he could do on the computer so they sent him letters offering him high pay jobs.
Within three years after Charley dropped out of high school in the tenth grade, he was earning $400,000.00 a year as a computer programmer. Charley had a hard time spending that much money every year, but he managed to spend every dime he made.
Then American Business, the largest corporations, got the idea that they could export the computer programming jobs to the third world where the workers were willing to work for what was much below minimum wages in the United States. Charley’s $400,000.00 a year job was exported to India where some computer genius was willing to do the work for $4,000.00 a year and the large corporations loved that. So the boss came to Charley and said, get all Your things from your desk, you are fired. Your job has been exported to India where a computer whiz is doing what you do and we pay the whiz kid only $4,000.00 a year. I will stay with you and walk you to the door so you cannot do any damage.
Charley reached for his computer to sign off. The Boss knocked him to the floor. "Don’t you try to sabotage the computer system just because we have fired you and put you on the street to beg for enough money to buy one Cheapie Hamburger a day to stay alive."
Charley was stunned. While getting to his feet Charley said, "I was just going to sign off the program."
"A likely story," said the Boss. The Boss reached over and pulled the plug on Charley’s computer. "Now you can't do any damage," the Boss said. "Get your things and I'll walk you to the door. We will give you a good recommendation if anyone has a job to offer you. However, all the good pay programming jobs are being exported to India so you super high paid programmers are going to be begging on the streets and that serves you right. Now let’s get out of here."
Charley went home and was in a state of near shock. Three days later it hit him hard that he was out of work and completely broke. For a while Charley went into a deep depression. Then he got hold of himself and started looking for work.
Every place Charley applied for a computer programming job he was told the same thing, "We shipped all our computer programming jobs to India." Charley wondered what he was going to do.
Charley was fired around the first of the month so he had two weeks to get a job. Charley thought, "I’ll get a job at Cheapie Hamburgers and make a new life for myself."
Charley found a company that owned 14 Cheapie Hamburger Stores in the Denver area, and they were hiring. Charley filled out an application. He was interviewed.
"Let me see here," the interviewer said. "Well I see that you have only a 10th grade education, that is one point in your favor. We do not hire high school graduates. However I see that you are an American Citizen. We can’t use you. We do not hired American Citizens. We hire only immigrants. If you are an illegal immigrant that gives you extra points in getting the job, but you were born and raised in the United States and are a Citizen. Sorry we do not hire American Citizens. And to make matters even worse, you speak good English. Our customers are accustomed to struggling to understand what our employees are saying to them. We definitely cannot use you. Sorry about that. I will walk you to the door and don’t you give me any trouble."
Charley was heart broken and a little depressed as he walked out the door. "Where am I going to apply for work?" he thought.
Someone walked up to Charley and handed him some change, "Here is all the change I have" the man said. "I saw you looking dejected and down and out and figured you were in bad need of money."
Charley was shocked at this man’s actions, but he took the change, thanked the man, then walked away. As he was walking someone else stuck out their hand and gave Charley some change, then walked on. Charley counted the change that had been given to him. "I have $1.50 in change given to me. I have an income," Charley thought.
So Charley walked down to the 16 street mall and as he walked many people handed him change. After he had walked 4 blocks Charley counted his change. "I now have $50.00 in change," Charley thought. "That’s not bad for 15 minutes of work. Maybe I should just walk the 16th street mall and accept handouts. I seem to have a natural knack for getting handouts."
As the day went by Charley would go into the stores and say ,"Could you use some change. I need to get some bills for this change I have." One store manager said, "Sonny why don’t you go to the bank to get bills for your change?" Charley like that idea. In fact he started an account at the US Bank on the 16th street mall.
On the application it asked for occupation. Charley wrote "Panhandler." The person at the bank was impressed with Charley’s honesty.
Charley kept meticulous records of his Panhandling money. Charley found he was taking in $3000.00 a week in his Panhandling efforts. But now Charley was not spending money like it was going out of style. Charley had become as tight as a rich man. He never tipped anyone and he made sure he got the right amount of change when he dined at Cheapie Hamburgers.
Charley wanted a decent meal so he decided he would go to the Appaloosa Grill and have something besides a Cheapie Hamburger. "One gets tired of eating the same food every day. I want a Buffalo Burger from the Appaloosa Grill.
On Friday, at about 1:30 PM when the lunch hour was over in the Appaloosa Grill Charley went in and found a place to sit. A rather good looking girl greeted him. "Do you want a drink before dinner sir?" she asked.
"No, Booze is the work of the Devil," Charley said. "Bring me a cup of gourmet coffee, if you have gourmet coffee."
The waitress said. "By the way my name is Bettry. I have seen you Panhandling and I think you are a neat guy." Bettry blushed.
They were both silent for a bit then Bettry said, "I’ll get your coffee."
Bettry returned with the coffee and Charley ordered a Buffalo Burger with Fries and he put in an order for some apple pie and ice cream after his Buffalo Burger had been consumed. Charley then set about enjoying the good food.
After Charley had eaten he got Bettry’s eye and motioned for her to come to his table. "Could I get my bill. I’m ready to go."
"It’s on me," Bettry said, "and here’s a $10.00 tip."
Charley was a little shocked at Bettry’s actions but he accepted the gift. Bettry said, "I get lonely at times. Do you ever get lonely?"
Charley said, "No I’m never lonely. I have my Cat when I get home. Top Cat is very good company and I surf the net a lot and play my Guitar. I never get lonely."
"Do you ever take a day off from Panhandling?"
"Well yes, I think God was smart to tell us to take one day off a week, as God did after he made the world. I figure if God needed one day off a week I probably ought to take one day off each week myself. One does not live by Panhandling alone."
"Oh you have such wisdom," Bettry said. "I have Sunday’s off. Do you Panhandle on Sunday?"
"No I take Sunday off myself," Charley said.
"I have a Porsche Boxster that one of my Sugar Daddy’s gave me before we called it quits last year. How about a ride in the Rockies this Sunday. We could drive up to Grand Lake and then over to Leadville, then to Aspen for Dinner and it’s all on me."
"I’d love it," Charley said. "I love Porsche Cars. The Porsche has always been one of my favorite cars."
"It’s a Convertible so we can ride with the top down and enjoy the wonderful outdoor climate of Colorado," Bettry said. "And I have a super stereo if you want to bring along a CD or two we can listen to your favorite music as we drive."
"I’d love it," Charley said.
"I’ll pick you up at sevenish, in the morn if that is all right with you. Where do you live?" Bettry asked.
Charley Returned to the Street and continued Panhandling. The Five, Ten and twenty dollars bills were coming in big time. One man gave him a $100.00 Bill. Charley thought, "Things are looking up. I lost my $400,000.00 a year job when the software work was exported to India, but I'm earning $3000.00 a week and a beautiful woman wants to take me for a ride in the Mountains in her Porsche Sports Car. Now what more could a person ask for. Since I'm doing so well in the Panhandling Business, I may start investing in stocks. I have always been good at picking winners when it comes to Stocks."
To be continued.
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